Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Fast & Furious 7 Adds Tony Jaa and Djimon Hounsou

According to this Collider article, Djimon Hounsou has joined the cast of Fast & Furious 7 (hereafter FF7). Djimon joins an already large ensemble cast that now features Jason Statham as the main villain and Tony Jaa in his Hollywood debut. I've commented previously on how FF7 can only be a success in my eyes if they don't miss the opportunity for an EPIC fight between Tony Jaa and Jason Statham., but now that Djimon has joined the cast, I'm hoping this doesn't lessen the chance of getting the Jaa vs. Statham fight. Djimon isn't necessarily an action star, but casting him seems to only bloat the ensemble more, creating less screen time possibility for the obvious 2014 action scene of the year: JAA  vs. STATHAM.

I will share two quick hopes I have for FF7  now that Jaa and Hounsou are on board:

1) My hope is for a Jaa-Statham fight, but I would also love to get in a Rock-Jaa, and Rock-Statham fight. The only way I can see this happening (since Statham is the confirmed baddie for #7) is if Jaa pulls off a good/bad switch somewhere in the middle of the movie. I'll say that we begin with a Tony Jaa- Paul Walker beat down. This shouldn't even be a fight, it should be a systematic destruction of Walker, because...Paul Walker. This of course catches the eye of the group and we are treated to a Jaa-Rock or Jaa-Rock and Vin Diesel fight when they confront Jaa. Through some stupid plot device (I don't care, they did it in #6) Jaa is turned and now fights for them. THUS - we get an all-out Jaa-Statham fight near the end.

Repeat after me, "Jaa vs. Statham, Jaa vs. Statham, Jaa vs. Statham"

The biggest threat to the potential of a classic Jaa-Statham fight is the fact that both Rock and Vin will likely earn the film's prestige action fight against Statham. The chances of a 3rd act Statham-Jaa fight is slim. The best bet on getting an epic Jaa-Statham fight is in the opening act, with Jaa as either a rival bad guy to Statham or as a good guy who also hates Statham and eventually joins with the group. I would throw out everything I wanted and compromise for (it stands a better chance of actually happening) an epic (think Bond opening action sequence) 1st act fight between Jaa vs. Statham.

2) You don't see Djimon Hounsou for the entire film, until the very last sequence following the Jaa vs. Statham finale showdown, and the FF7 crew walking away in victory. "Now You Are Free" from the film score to Gladiator begins to swell as the camera reveals Djimon dressed in the same outfit from Gladiator as he looks up to the skies as if he's talking to Maximus. He then breaks the 4th wall and stares directly into the camera and says, "You want this series to end...but not yet...not yet" Then the screen cuts to black, the FF7 logo comes up and some hip-hop track blasts on the speakers. After the credits, cue some kind of cut scene where Djimon is revealed as the next villain.


WHO DO I HAVE TO PAY TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN?
Or is something that kickstarter would be good for?
Got a better idea? Let me know

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